Sunday, September 21, 2008

Third Trimester!!!

I am officially in my third trimester and have less than 90 days to go! This pregnancy has gone by so quickly (for the most part) and I am trying to enjoy every moment, seeing as we still don't know how many children we want and this could potentially be the last time I do this. Although there are some of the normal discomforts of pregnancy I can honestly say I am one of those women who not only enjoys it, but LOVES being pregnant. The whole process is so amazing to me. I love feeling the baby move, watching my body change and knowing what I am making is a miracle. And although I so long to meet this baby and hold him/her, and see my children (that still sounds weird) together, I know this part of it goes by all too quickly.

We are already so blessed to have one healthy, smart, thriving child and I feel equally blessed with the upcoming arrival of this next one. Being a parent is so much more fun than I ever thought it would be. We knew it would be hard, long nights, sick children, ER visits and lots of bodily fluids, you hear all about that. But I honestly did not know how FUN this would be. Each day is a new adventure and to see things through my child's eyes is such a blessing. Her perspective on things keeps me in the moment. As a parent I find myself eagerly looking forward to new accomplishments and milestones in her life, but clinging to the very moment we're in, knowing she will only be little for such a short amount of time. Sometimes I wish I could pause the day, hour or second we're in and go back to it at any time. There are so many things that cannot be captured, even on film. So I will try to burn the memories into my mind, as many as I can. Because I know this will all go by before I know it.

Saturday, September 6, 2008

Friday, September 5, 2008

Five Years

This past weekend Ben and I celebrated our fifth anniversary. Sometimes it's hard to believe it's been that long, it seems like it was so recently that I was tearfully kissing him goodbye, wondering when he would be back to marry me. Seven months later he returned to fulfill that promise and on August 31st 2003 we were married. One year later, to the day, he left for his second deployment to Iraq. After just six weeks I received the news that he had been seriously wounded. Two days later I was on a flight to Germany to get my man. What followed was months, and ultimately, years of recovery and healing. And though he is not the same man I married, in many ways, I still get glimpses of that man through everything that he has been through and I know it has changed and shaped our marriage forever. And although I never would have prayed for something like that to happen to him, or to us, I thank God that it did.

Today, and everyday, I am so thankful he was the soul survivor of that terrible day. Having the kind of perspective that incident gave us so early in our marriage was a gift. I am able to focus on what is truly important in life and know that sometimes you just have to let the little things go. These past five years have been everything I dreamed of and nothing like I thought they would be. Even on our worst days, I know we are lucky to have each other. I have a hardworking, chivalrous, upright, handsome husband who spoils me rotten and allows me to live out my dream of being a stay at home mom to my children. It hasn't always been easy or fun, but I wouldn't trade it for anything. Seeing him as the father of my children only deepens my love and respect for him. I cannot imagine raising Kaitlyn (and this next baby) without his support and guidance, both for them and myself.

We are not perfect, we disagree, squabble and make mistakes. But if someone had told me 10 years ago that this is where I would be at this moment in my life, I would have wondered how all my dreams came true.